January 2012
11 posts
a picture of you holding a picture of me, in the...
I haven’t been able to shake off the thought of Psalm 84 since last night. I grew up around this chapter. I know it by heart. I’ve read it. It’s been read to me. I’ve circled its word and highlighted its verses and I’ve built thoughts and pictures and stories around it. But I don’t know… last night it kinda just knocked on my door like an old friend and I’ve been thinking about it differently.
I...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XZD_H5KfbaM&feature=related
Zac Brown Band covering Ray Lamontagne’s Jolene? Are the heavens opening wide? Was a baby just born? Why am I so happy? Newest obnoxious obsession until I end up hating the song? I think yes.
Between us - Peter Bradley Adams
listen.
and while you’re at it, listen to “be still my heart” by him too. you’re welcome :)
I havent felt or been myself the last few weeks. Ive been getting mad easily, losing my patience, critical….everything I dont ever want to be. I dont know. I cant stand myself lately. Ive been listening to chris browns “next to you” on repeat and how I managed to get toothpaste in my eye this morning is beyond me. Ive even been falling asleep before 12 which is ridiculously rare....
“You’re not like the others. I’ve seen a few; I know. When I talk, you look at...”
– Ray Bradbury, Fahrenheit 451 (via light-essence)
carry this picture for luck
So on Monday I was doing what every other middle class American was up to… cleaning out my humble abode and throwing out/organizing a years worth of junk I’ve managed to collect. Put brand new white bed sheets, did all my laundry, yadiyadi. I even gathered a bag full of old clothes I want to get rid of (um, HELLO ex hoarder?!) and managed to finish in time to watch the game. BOOM.
...
white blank page and a swelling rage
There are only enough nights where you can leave the porch light on and the key underneath the mat until every car sounds the same and the bulb begins to flicker. There are only enough summer days before the cold brings you inside. Its not to say that the ocean will ever get tired of chasing the shore but sometimes, things just need to end. Books reach their last page and songs hit their last note...
December 2011
3 posts
I feel like i’m always trying to work on a project. My old roommate used to tell me that I was always in some sort of mission. The thing is that one time I decided I wanted a new dresser, but instead of buying a new one I felt like painting my old one. Well, I went to Lowes and I bought sandpaper and spray paint and ended up making him help me sand the dresser down at 2AM because I...
November 2011
9 posts
Its 12:11am and I am baking a corn souffle for tomorrows potluck at work, so I figured now is a better time than ever to write down a few major pointers of my current life status.
1. I really need to go to bed earlier. Or wake up earlier. The thing is, I live 5 minutes from work and I still manage to show up late and with sheet marks on my face because I havent been awake for more than 30...
I saw sparks
Its easy to take a car or a plane and stand barefoot at the edge of the ocean. Its easy to let the wind weave between your fingers and the water kiss you like its been waiting years and summers for you to pass by. Its easy, at that moment, to feel so small. To feel so insignificant. You know, beside the raging waves and blanket of sand and the sound of the air pushing it all towards you. Its easy...
this is what i do at 1am on wednesday nights....
“Date a girl who reads. Date a girl who spends her money on books instead of clothes. She has problems with closet space because she has too many books. Date a girl who has a list of books she wants to read, who has had a library card since she was twelve. Find a girl who reads. You’ll know that she does because she will always have an unread book in her bag.She’s the one lovingly looking...
Every
You are every grain
Every color of the sky at 6pm
Every sound of waves colliding
Every boat and plane and car and train
Every single one of those coming home
You’re dreams and frozen lakes
Tired hands and anxious hearts
You’re coffee in the middle of the night
You’re the heavens and every bit of its lights
You’re every drop of rain on every blade of grass
...
Nerdy post
Sitting in finance class right now reading “ode and burgeonings” by pablo neruda for the millionth time. Love him. Love his words. Hes like a more modern version of e.e cummings for me, and alittle less creepy. I tried to find the story behind “ode and burgeonings”, tried to google who she was or if it even was about someone, because you know… sometimes we read...
The truth is we learn to love. The truth is we need to watch someone point out the moon so we can find it beautiful until we no longer need someone to look up for us to see. The truth is we need to have someone turn up the radio until we learn to find the songs on our own. The truth is that we need to read words before we can write them. The truth is we need to be taken to the ocean before we can...
full moon, Nov 10 2011
Lets just listen to the way the street cars pass and wonder if they’re coming or going. Lets try to remember if the sky was this color at 6pm in the summer. Let’s look around and pretend we own these roads and if they had voices they’d call us by name. They’d mimic our steps. They’d laugh at our jokes. Let’s do anything but not be...
I love words. I love how they fit and what they do and I love the way they can echo and create. I remember one time when I was in elementary school and I first heard the saying, “sticks and stones will break my bones but words could never hurt me” ; i remember hearing my teacher try to comfort us and i remember getting in the car that afternoon and telling my mom i thought she was...
October 2011
6 posts
and inbetween the moon and you...
You deserve the things that you’re afraid to believe in. You deserve the dreams that you’re afraid to have. And all your life you’ve been foolishly hiding your hope underneath your coat and walking with your hands in your pockets as the street lights lead you, hoping they’ll take you home. Hoping they’ll carry you back. Hoping you’ll get surprised. And I hope...
where the streets have no name...
I’ve found myself twirling the pen at this time at night, trying to dig out words and phrases and also attempting to gather up the little bit of energy i have left to help me draw it out. However, it’s all been incredibly unsuccessful because I can’t even write out a sentence that makes any sense. I guess that’s okay. You can’t always get it right. You can’t...
September 2011
6 posts
'she could be rainy days, minimum wage, a book...
The Maine
2 tags
Wrote this a few days ago…. just wanted to share.
I think alot of times, probably more times than we can appreciate, moments happen where we wish we could put in a bottle and keep forever. Thats why we take pictures and we record songs and make videos because we want to remember. And thats why I think we compare our foolish acts to “chasing the wind”, not because it’s...
airport musings
If you ever get to witness the colors the sky turns into right about the time the sun tries to hide and if you stay looking long enough for the moon to make its grand finale and my god, if you ever get to feel the wind while your feet hug the grass and the sun dances on your skin and if you ever, ever get to see an ocean so wide that it makes you believe in all the things you’ve had a hard...
won't go home without you
I’ve always been a massive romantic. The ideas of everything love could be, fully equipped with the enormous array of affections and words and cheesiness… yeah, I’m into all that… so I’ve seen the movies and I’ve read the books and I’ve heard the songs. However, the first time I ever saw love played out in front of me.. like really in front of me, wasn’t in some big screen or Nicholas Sparks...
August 2011
10 posts
my dear, we're slow dancing in a burning room.
Sometimes I think in romantic metaphors and sometimes I think like a straight up gangster… and right now, this very moment, i’m the latter. Look people, let’s not be stupid. I’m realizing more and more that somehow we are never out of the loop. Somehow life always throws us signs, whether they are green ones or flashing warning ones, we kind of always know. 2 years ago, my...
Between the dreams and the regrets and the fears and trust and between all the things I want and the things I have… and somewhere between all the places I want to be and exactly where I am, I, more times than not, have to remind myself of one thing…. Be still. I’ve always strived to quiet my soul the way I’ve taught myself to quiet my mouth but its so hard. So so hard. On any given morning I can...
i dont have a choice, but id still choose you -...
When i was in the 6th grade I had this project for school where we had to put together pictures and paragraphs on how we envisioned our lives to be like 20 years from then. I remember walking into class and all my friends had lamborghinis and pictures of the kind of houses you’d see on MTV Cribs… with gold toilets and the whole shabang. I showed up with a cut out of a white jeep...
People always say things happen for a reason, but in all honesty, I’d give up all those reasons just to have you back. I sometimes hesitate talking about you or writing about you and sharing these words because no one wants to read sad letters to someone they’ve never met, you know? People want hope and they want happy endings. But the beautiful part of it all is that although these...
2 tags
train, 'for me its you'
You get what you give. For the most part. But not always. And when you don’t, don’t let this world turn you cold. Look, I know what passion can do. I know where loving people till the core of your core could take you and I know what its like time and time again to feel yourself stripped to your very bones because you’ve given it all away. I know what it’s like to feel tired and feel mad when...
Your Every Color by Train
i love every word in this song. every single one.
you turn me into someone i would rather be
I don’t hope you find all that you’re looking for. I hope you try. I hope you look for truth and I hope you sometimes look alone. I hope you carry your heart out in your hands and I hope it stains everything you touch. I hope you learn to love the winters as much as you love your summers. I hope you wait for sunsets like you wait for it to rise and I hope you look out your window every...
If i can be honest, there are days I feel peeled to my bare bones. It’s funny because anytime I feel pushed to the edge all I can think to do is run. I never do. But I always think it. However, those days are few because there is always a phone call, a text, a card, a spoken word, a gift, a ‘just because’, an email..anything, that just reminds me of how truly blessed i am to know...
July 2011
22 posts
“Oh I’ve got this friend, holding on to her heart like it’s a little...”
– The Civil Wars, I’ve got this friend.
Favorite song of the day.
take a bow, cause you played your heart out. -...
There is no greater agony that bearing an untold story inside of you. – Maya Angelou
So this story is about sun stained cheeks and a library of memories. It’s about putting one foot in front of the other. Today. Tomorrow. Next week. It’s about mix tapes in car rides and hand surfing in a cotton dress. It’s about letting go and holding on. It’s about folding my heart into different shapes that...
